Having lived with an introvert for a few years now, I thought it would be useful and fun to jot down some thoughts on life with someone on the opposite personality spectrum. This isn't a review of what it is like to be an introvert but a review of what it’s like to live with someone who is an introvert. Enjoy!
- They need time by themselves whether they vocalise it or not, which they probably won’t because they are introverted. So make sure you give them plenty of space and alone time. Accept that’s who they are, even if you don’t understand it.
- When in a big crowd, you may need to step up and do more of the talking but careful not to be too much. An extra extrovert like myself can sometimes take it too far and take over the entire conversation.
- Before stressful situations, have a chat about boundaries. Ie. If you are jumping on a call with a friend or family, it’s okay if the introvert in your life says ‘keep it brief bitch’.
- Don’t take it personally when they get aggy in a high-stress situation. My introvert gets quite aggravated any time we go to a really busy location (think ASDA on Christmas Eve or Primark any day). The way he describes it is like that scene in Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkanban when Harry is by the lake getting his soul ripped out of him by the dementors. So it’s somewhat understandable when your introvert gets a tad snappy. Don’t take it personally, leave the location, take them home, make them a cup of tea and leave them to decompress in a dark room for about 60 minutes.
- When stressed with work (and they have a home office) periodically leave cups of tea and snacks outside their door and just text them that there’s a delivery for them. They may not vocalise it, but they appreciate it.
- Although reluctant at first, they enjoy baths, with epsom salts and some nice bubbles. If your introvert has a taste for the finer things in life like mine, they may even agree to a scented candle or a face mask. Again, make them a cup of tea or give them a glass of vino, a fully charged iPad and leave them in the bath for 40 to 60mins. NB: This only works for domesticated introverts. May not work for a more recently acquired one. They may need some more breaking in but be careful not to startle them (they are quite skittish at the beginning).
- Basically treat an introvert like a mogwai: Don’t expose them to sunlight, don’t get them wet and don’t feed them after midnight.
All in all, introverts come with their perks and peculiarities but they make for the perfect life partners. They are great listeners, empathetic and their sense of presence is priceless. I’ve never felt more seen and understood, like truly understood the way my husband gets me. He just sees me in such great detail which in turn is a great way for me to grow as a person and reflect on my own habits and behaviours.
They are known to be faithful, partially because the prospect of meeting a new potential mate and having to open up their soul to a new person fills them up with dread.
Would I recommend an introvert to a friend? Yes! 10/10